Do you know what your children are being taught?

Our kids are trusting and impressionable!

When you send your children off to school every day, you trust the teacher to teach the basic educational curriculum that will prepare them to reach their future goals.  You expect them to become proficient in math, the sciences, literacy.  You expect them to be treated with fairness and be protected from harm.  You expect that the things they learn won't clash with your values and standards.

Teachers are wonderful people who devote their lives to teaching and training young minds and should be respected for their dedication to their
profession.  Too often though, teachers have little control over the curriculum they are required to present.  They are required to adhere to the dictates given them by school boards and federal mandates.   These may or may not reflect your standards.

Do you know what your children are being taught?  Don't assume you know.  I strongly recommend that you ask permission to check over the textbooks and other material your children are being taught.  Pay attention to laws passed as they concern education.   Know what your children should be mastering at each grade.  Become involved in their schools.  Volunteer.  Ask for parent/teacher conferences if necessary.  Join the PTA and other organizations.  When parents get involved, change can happen.

There are many options for our children's education that weren't available even a few years ago.  Many schools are willing to work with families.  When that isn't a possibility, there are alternatives...online schools, charter schools and/or homeschool, even a combination of some or all of the above. 

I believe that you have the right to see that your children are taught in accordance with the values you hold as a family.  Your children are impressionable and believe the things they are taught in school.  Be a responsible parent and educate yourself.   Know what they are learning!  Stand up for them and the values you hold dear.

Magical, Wonderful Books

As technology becomes more and more integrated into our children's schools, traditional bound books are taking a backseat to the educational process.  What a pity!

There's something magical about a book.  Maybe it's the feel.  Maybe it's turning the pages.  Maybe it's the simplicity of it.  Wherever you are, a book can be a comfortable friend.

If your children's schools are heavily into laptops and tablets, make sure to devote time at home to reading to and with your children...with real books!  Your children are never too old to gather together for reading aloud.  They should have easy access to all kinds of books, not just learning books but fun and silly ones too.  Start a tradition (if you don't already) of giving each of your children a book at Christmas and/or birthdays...in addition to other gifts, of course.  Visit the library often.  Have bookshelves full of books in a prominent place at home.  Show by example that books are important to you.

Children who read have better vocabularies, writing skills and critical thinking skills.  Teach a child to love books and you will have created a life-long learner. 


Note - Pictures taken by Melody Frees.  Used with permission.

A boy bunny and a girl bunny make...

On the front page of my local newspaper, there was an article about a man who is creating a video game for children to "show kids message of love".  Sounds harmless, doesn't it?

Reading further, the motivation gets a little murky.  In the game, "cupid" shoots arrows at bunnies.  When a boy bunny and a girl bunny get hit, a new bunny appears (that's logical).  However, if two boy bunnies or two girl bunnies get hit, a rainbow appears and new bunnies start appearing in different colors.  The object of the game is to get the most rainbows.  Or in other words, to make as many boy/boy and girl/girl couplings.

My objections?  Two boy bunnies or two girl bunnies can't make baby bunnies and teaching little kids that they can, is just plain wrong.  Also, to "win" the game, the player is encouraged to make as many rainbow pairings as possible.  What does this teach young children?

I admit, my perspective comes from a traditional christian background.  Even then, I have taken enough classes in anatomy and biology to know that it takes a girl "bunny" and a boy"bunny" to make a baby "bunny".  I also believe that that configuration is the healthiest for the baby "bunny".  The male species and the female species each contain certain gender-based characteristics which compliment each other in creating a family. 

What is the world coming to?  Sigh...

Four important school skills

Ready for her first day of school!

Two kids might have the same high IQ and similar home environments but one might excel and another struggle.  Why the difference?  You'd think that being smart was enough to guarantee success but there's more to success than pure intelligence.

The children who have mastered (or are in the process of mastering) the following skills and behaviors are more likely to have a positive experience at school and later as adults.

1. The ability to follow directions and its companion (2.) the ability to listen.  You've been teaching this since your child was a baby.  Just a couple of examples - Giving her chores commensurate with her age helps her learn how to follow directions.  Asking her to repeat what you said if she seems distracted, helps her learn to focus on what you say.  Keep working with her on this skill...she definitely needs it for school!

3. Reasonable self-control.  Ah yes, being able to control himself!  This includes refraining from tantrums, hitting and other physical no-no's; yelling, swearing and other verbal no-no's;  keeping hands and other body parts to himself; not taking things that don't belong to him.  Even some adults haven't mastered self-control yet but it's something your children will greatly benefit from learning, and the sooner the better.

4. Basic organizational skills.  Some kids are naturally neat and tidy and others need LOTS of help!  To succeed at school, your child needs to be able to keep track of assignments and other papers, school supplies and things like jackets and lunch boxes.  Losing these can cause stress and lost time for you, your child and her teacher. 

These are skills that can be taught, starting while your children are young and then expanded upon as they grow.  As you interact with your children every day, you are teaching and reinforcing these important life skills. 

How to create a book lover :)

If you want your children to love books, you need to make books part of their life.  Surround them with books they can love.  Introduce them to a variety of genres.  Read to them.  

Is it any surprise this little baby grew up to be an avid reader?

Raised on classic Disney...

And classic board books...Love Goodnight Moon!

And books that can be properly "devoured"  :)

Throw in a little geography for balance...

So careful with the pages!

Same little girl, same love of books  :)

Educational Options - What's a parent to do?

The advertisements are everywhere.  The stores are bringing in new stock.  It's officially Back to School mode.  How can that be?  Summer barely started!  Oh well, with that reminder, let's think about some of the options you and your children have.

In the olden days, kids went to the local school and that was that.  A few children went to parochial school but they were few.  If you didn't like the school in your neighborhood, you either just lived with it or moved to a more desirable neighborhood and school.  Those were your options.

Now, it's infinitely more complicated.  Not only is the local school an option, but you can also choose from charter schools, magnet schools, alternative schools, online schools, homeschool, private schools, Montessori schools or a combination of any of the above.  What's a family to do?

The key to finding the right educational fit for your family is to educate yourself.  (Funny, huh?)  Every family, every child and every family's situation is different.  What works for one family might be totally wrong for another.  Originally, we chose to homeschool our children because my husband's work required traveling to different parts of the country.  We wanted to go with him, without disrupting our children's school work.  The answer?  Homeschool them and keep their curriculum consistent.  It worked for us.

Your job as your child's parent and advocate is to see that your child is learning what and how you think is best.  You need to know who your child's teachers are.  You need to know who their friends and their friend's parents are.   You need to know what is being taught in your child's grade.  Volunteer in the school.  Be informed and involved. 

You can't sit back and leave the education of your children to someone else.  Parenthood isn't for the lazy.  If you send your child to school, your job isn't finished.  Know what is going on.  If you homeschool, you can't sit back and do nothing.  You need to be actively involved and see that your child is learning according to set standards.

You can't assume that because your school worked for you that it will work for your child too.  Times have changed.  But, there are now far more options than there ever were when you were growing up.  Find out what they are.  Do what's best for YOUR child and YOUR family. 

Making meal planning easier

choosemyplate.gov

Menu planning and grocery shopping are not my favorite activities.  I often wish Purina (who makes cat chow, dog chow and other animal feed) would come up with People Chow so I didn't have to worry about planning what to cook.  :)   Not only do we have to plan and make meals, we have to be mindful of nutrition, budget and health.  Purina, where are you?!

Having studied nutrition and worked with families who needed education on planning healthy, inexpensive meals,  I found that the best resource for teaching these things is found on the USDA's website, choosemyplate.gov.  This is the latest guideline for health and wellness from the federal government, replacing the My Pyramid program.  Its name come from the visual representation of how the proportion of various types of food should look on your plate.

This website has information, recipes, and tips for planning and preparing healthy meals that are based on different families needs and lifestyles.  They focus on whole grains, fruits and veggies, lean meats and foods that are naturally inexpensive.  Included are charts and calculators for tracking your food input, weight, goals and exercise.  There is even a section for teaching children about food and nutrition which is quite entertaining and fun (well, however fun learning about nutrition is, anyway).   It is quite inclusive! 

I highly recommend this website and hope you take a look at it!  Anything to make the process easier is my type of program!

Working together

I read a short article in the newspaper today that I really enjoyed.  Apparently the superintendent of a Connecticut school district has banned cursing.  Any student who swears at an adult gets suspended for 10 days and sent home with a bar of soap.  :)  The reasoning is that quality learning can't occur in an environment where students think it's ok to swear.

"Did you hear what he said?!?!"

Yay for that superintendent!  It's about time someone in authority takes a stand against swearing.  It's become so prevalent in our society that it's not uncommon to hear little children yell and curse at each other and at their parents.  Apparently, kids are comfortable cursing at their teachers too.

As with any behavior problem, the solution begins at home.  You can't have a no swearing policy at home and expect your children to obey it if you or your spouse are guilty of using "colorful" language.  You can't expect your child's school to fix a problem that you contributed to.  Together, the school and the home can make a big difference in teaching children acceptable and civilized behavior.

Hopefully, a bar of soap won't be necessary to enforce appropriate language behavior but many a child has learned what soap tastes like after trying a new word out on Mom or Dad.  It's a pretty powerful lesson.  Good luck New Britain School District!

Homeschooling - What about socialization?

Funny thing about when we decided to homeschool...we thought people would be concerned about our children's education.  Nope.  The main reaction we got was, "What about socialization?!"  At first I was perplexed.  Socialization?  What did that have to do with education?  Of course my kids knew how to get along with other people and knew basic social skills.  But that's not what people meant.  What they were really concerned about was the fact that my kids weren't getting educated in a classroom with 20-30 other children their age.  To them, that was the experience they felt that all children needed.

To me socialization is part of living.  It's either positive or negative, not absent or present.  Babies "socialize" as they learn how to interact with the people around them.  Children learn that hitting and biting are unacceptable and being mean to other children almost guarantees that they won't have friends.  That's socialization!  These skills and others are learned by interacting with other people, regardless of age.

There are some children (and adults) who have poor social skills who were educated in a traditional school setting.  There are also homeschooled children who are comfortable and confident in any social setting.  It has more to do with the personality of the child himself and his upbringing at home than the type of school he attends.

As long as the homeschool parent includes lots of interaction with people of all ages, exposes the kids to many and varied experiences, and teaches appropriate behavior by both example and training, the kids are going to be able to function well in any situation. 

Why we decided to homeschool

Things might have been different if my oldest child had been born in the spring or summer.  As it was, she was born two weeks after the cut-off date for the beginning of kindergarten in our school district.  Being a conscientious parent, I was concerned about how that was going to affect my little girl.  She was a bright and curious four year old, having taught herself to read, do simple addition and subtraction problems and was eager to learn more.  I scheduled an appointment with the kindergarten teacher to discuss the options for her (hoping that she'd suggest that we try to petition the district to allow her to enter kindergarten early).  The teacher was not very encouraging.  She said that if my daughter already knew the basic learning skills taught in kindergarten, she'd just have to wait until the other children caught up.  That was not an acceptable option.

I began to research other options.  All I wanted was for my daughter to retain her love of learning and find a suitable school for her.  There were a few private schools but they were expensive.  Then, one day I was at the public library and while browsing the titles, a book practically jumped out at me.  Written in bold white letters on a black background, the book was titled, Teach Your Own.  I had never heard of such a radical idea.  All children went to school...so I thought.  I checked out the book and began reading about a totally foreign option to public school...homeschool.  How very strange, yet intriguing.  Our school district didn't want to work with us, my husband was getting ready to take on a year long computer job in California and this book was telling us that we didn't have to put our child in school.  We could teach her ourselves.

So began the journey into the world of homeschooling. We knew that we'd be away from home for a year and thought we'd try it for that year and then re-evaluate.   It seemed like a perfect solution.  Our little girl could learn at her own pace and we'd get to explore a new city together and we'd see how it worked out, never realizing that we'd just ventured into a whole new way of living for our family.  This little "experiment" lasted through eight children (K-12) and prepared each of them to enter the world of higher education upon "graduation".

We encountered difficulties and challenges along the way but each year the pros outweighed the cons.  Homeschooling isn't for everyone but it worked for my family.   It was totally worth the time and commitment to see it through.

More on homeschooling next week...

Educational Options

Always learning

Children are different.  No surprise there.  They also have different learning styles and different developmental growth. That is why I am so thankful for the educational options that are available to families.  Finally, all children aren't expected to conform to one particular style, regardless of their unique circumstances.

When children have trouble fitting into traditional educational styles, there are other options to consider.  Each state is different in their laws concerning schools and age requirements but most are flexible and work with parents and children, as long as parents are willing to work within the law.

I have friends whose children are in the local public schools, in charter schools, magnet schools, online public and private schools, Montesorri schools and homeschool.  Each family made their decision based on the needs of their children and their family lifestyle.

Our children's education is one of their most important responsibilities growing up.  From the approximate age of 5 until 18 (and beyond), they spend most of their time in school.  Knowing that there are options will help families make the best educational fit for their children.

The next post I write will be about why my family decided to homeschool.  Until then...

Are you ready for school?

Sigh...it's that time of year again

For some of you there's a sigh of relief.  For others, it's a sigh of regret.  Whichever it is, there's no hiding the fact that summer is almost over and school is about to start.  There's a subtle change in the air, the days are noticeably getting shorter and the stores are stocking fall clothes and Halloween decorations.

Are you ready for a new school year?  Are your kids ready?  What have you done to show that you value education for your children?  Do you have a quiet place set aside for them to do their homework?  Do you have bookshelves and other resources dedicated to their educational materials?  Have you set expectations for them?

There is so much you can do to help them have a successful year.  Showing that you think education is important by making a place for them to work and setting rules to balance schoolwork and recreation (and then reinforcing those rules!) will be a good start.

My little "cocoon"

Being a good mom, I tried to give my children lots of opportunities to learn about their world.  We'd explore beaches, forests, parks, anywhere and everywhere and look for and identify plants, insects and other living things.  The kids would bring home shells, flowers, rocks and whatever else caught their interest.  That was all fine and good...until that ONE time...

While getting ready to move from Pennsylvania to Arizona, I found (what looked like) a cocoon firmly attached to a twig of a tree.  (I am NOT an entomologist!) Thinking that it would be interesting for the kids to watch the butterfly emerge from its cocoon, I snapped off the twig and brought it home for the kids.  We put it in a glass mason jar, stuck lots of holes in the lid and set it on the kitchen counter.

About a week later we moved cross country; my husband, 5 young children, and one carefully protected little mason jar containing my "cocoon".  We arrived at my mother-in-law's home and I gently put my jar on the dresser in the bedroom we were going to use while we were looking for a home of our own.

Being busy with little kids, a strange environment and trying to get settled in a new area, I admit to forgetting about the jar on the dresser until I woke up one morning and noticed that there was a large number of very tiny insects all over our room.  It didn't take me long to find the source...my little jar.  Crawling out of the lid and all over the room were hundreds of tiny praying mantis'!  I had transported an ootheca (that's the fancy name of the protective capsule containing the mantis' eggs) from Pennsylvania to Arizona.  I have no idea if I had just introduced a insect species that would upset the fragile balance of nature in Phoenix, AZ or if they all just died out but I sure worked hard to get them out of my mother-in-laws house...fast!

Lesson learned...whatever nifty thing you or your children find outside, don't bring it in the house and try to find out what it is BEFORE you get unpleasantly surprised!

Oh, and if my mother-in-law is reading this..."I'm sorry I let praying mantis' hatch in your room."  :)

Focus on the future

Children's concept of the future is very limited and they are pretty much focused on right now.  They can be impulsive and short-sighted.  Because of that, it's up to us to help them see how their decisions NOW will affect their future LATER.

Although this is true in every aspect of life, it is especially obvious when it comes to education.  Even though YOU know that good grades and study skills are important and will be necessary for whatever profession your child chooses to pursue, your child is only thinking that homework is an inconvenience and is keeping him from what he really wants to do...whether that's playing video games or whatever.  He doesn't realize that what he is doing now is building a foundation for future opportunities.  He's not going to appreciate you reminding him of his responsibility to his schoolwork but you understand the importance of it so you help him "adjust" his priorities and encourage him and give him as many opportunities as possible so his options won't be limited.

We are important in the lives of our children.  Our knowledge and understanding of consequences based on our experience can be used to help them avoid much disappointment and be prepared for anything they want to do in the future. 

Help! My kid doesn't care about homework!

You have a smart child in elementary school but he just doesn't seem to care about doing homework.  No matter what you do or threaten, he dawdles, does a sloppy job, forgets his work and makes your life miserable.  If you could just get it into his head that school is important for his future, you know he'd take interest in his schoolwork, and life would be more pleasant for you, him and the rest of the family.

Let's think this through together.  Does he have a learning disability or other medical condition that makes it hard to concentrate?  Have you talked with his teacher to get suggestions for getting him to fulfill his assignments?  Does he have a designated study place at home?  Does he know the consequences of not completing his work?

Often the best time to do homework is right after school, before he gets busy with friends and activities.  Get him a snack, ask him about his day, have him go to the bathroom and change his clothes.  Set him up at his work place, set a time to complete the assignment, and stay close to monitor his progress and answer questions.  You can use this time to do paperwork of your own (budget, bills, writing etc).  When his time is up, calmly go over his work with him and either dismiss him to go play or hand out the consequence of not finishing.  No arguing, no pleading, no threatening, no deal-making.  Just a disappointed mom following through.  And DO follow through, even if he has soccer practice, a birthday party to go to, a Scout activity, whatever.  It shouldn't take too many times of missing something fun for him to realize that you mean business.

If you don't want this issue to turn into a power struggle between you and your son, you'll do your best to stay calm and matter-of-fact when dealing with the situation.  The fact is you cannot make your child care...about schoolwork or anything.  You can provide an atmosphere of learning and support but he is the one who has to do the work.  You can set expectations and then follow through with appropriate consequences...consistently!  Then he has the opportunity to choose...to complete his work in a timely manner or risk losing privileges and activities when he fails to meet the expectations of you and his teacher.   It's up to him.  You've done your part.

Political discussions with your kids

Even though it's only September, I am overwhelmed with the number of political advertisements bombarding my home.  On the TV, in the mail, over the phone, everyone wants to sell me on their candidate or cause.  There is no doubt in my mind that this upcoming election is going to be a hot topic for us all.  This includes our children.  If they are old enough to go to school, most likely they are going to have lessons about our Presidents, the election process and even some of the causes of the day.  Their peers are going to talk about it.  They're going to hear discussions from teachers and other adults.

Your job as a mother is to be informed yourself and find ways to bring your children into conversations concerning the election in November.  They need to know what you believe in and why.  You need to be open with them so their questions can be discussed and misconceptions cleared up.  Even adults get confused with all the conflicting information swirling around!  Your children may be too young to vote, but they are old enough to start forming their own opinions and values.

One rule that I have is if I want to know about a person running for office, I will NOT look at or listen to information about him or her that is furnished by the opposition.  Why would they give me an accurate depiction of someone they want to defeat?  Instead, I'll search the particular person's record and values and weigh their supporter's endorsements to see how closely their beliefs match mine.  I'll look up his or her official website.  You can tell your older children to do the same, or better yet, do it together and learn together. 

It's going to be an interesting couple of months coming up.  I already keep the TV remote close by so I can mute the political commercials.  :)  I suggest you do the same!

Back to school!

Either the kids are back in school or will be soon.  Does that mean you're off the hook for teaching them?  No way!  Not only are you your children's first teacher, but the teaching you provide your children will be an ongoing thing for the rest of your life.  You don't even get to retire at age 65!  :) 

First day of school!!!

You might depend on public or private school to teach your kids academics or you might homeschool your children and oversee their education yourself but however you do it, you have the responsibility to see to it that your children are educated, academically, socially, spiritually and emotionally.  That's a big responsibility but there is no one who cares more about your children than you.

Make your home a place of learning.  Have comfortable and distraction-free places for your kids to study and do homework.  Set aside time for school related activities.  Be an involved parent.  Know what is being taught to your children.  Probably most important, talk with your kids every day about what went on at school that day.  Not in an interrogating sort of way, but as a concerned and interested parent.

Help make this a great year for your kids!

Thrifty Thursday - Ever learning

It always surprised me the number of moms who told me that they wished they could learn a new skill or hobby or --- but couldn't because they couldn't afford classes or get babysitters, or their kids were too young or some other reason.  True, there are some things that have to be taught by qualified instructors and have to be hands-on (like sky diving).  But, there are so many other things that anyone can learn in the privacy of their own home, and don't cost anything, or very little.  With books, mentors, online tutorials and instructions, there is no reason why you shouldn't continue to grow and expand your knowledge and skills.  You have many responsibilities as a mom but you also are a woman who has a mind and abilities, and exploring and developing these will only make you a more well rounded individual.  So, what are some things you want to learn about?  Do you want to improve your homemaking skills?  Do you want to learn more about politics or the stock market?  Do you want to learn photography or other creative skills?   Do you want to learn woodworking and carpentry?  (I do!)  Do you want to improve your health and fitness? You can do it.  Go to the library.  Look online.  Ask your friends.  And then practice, practice, practice.  Your first attempts might not be the greatest but keep at it.

When I was a young mom, I wanted to learn how to do smocking (little girl's smocked dresses were very popular at the time and very expensive), but we didn't have any extra money for classes so I got a book and did the "trial and error" thing.  I practiced with scraps of material, then moved up to making a bonnet and then a baby dress and by then I was comfortable with the technique and could follow patterns.  My friends were amazed that I learned it on my own but really, anyone could have done the same.  You don't have to have someone stand over you and tell you what to do.

Currently, I want to learn how to build things.  I've been practicing with my husband's circular saw and I already know how to use his drill and some of his other power tools so I'm getting pretty close to trying something real.  I love ana-white.com and have my eye on some of her projects.  Wish me luck!

Now, it's your turn to learn something new too!